Calling all grandpas and grandmas: Your role in the family is irreplaceable. What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind?

A new national movement has been rolled out ahead of Grandparents’ Day (fourth Sunday of November) with the vision of building stronger intergenerational families.

Soft-launched by Cultivate SG, a secular non-profit organisation that researches and dialogues on family issues in Singapore, Grander Together aims to inspire grandparents to be more involved in the lives of their grandchildren, among other objectives.

Similar to other nation-wide movements such as Dads for Life and Mums for Life, Grander Together wants to reach out to everyone in Singapore, regardless of religion.

To that end, a taskforce has been assembled comprising members from different backgrounds. Many who are spearheading this movement are also grandparents themselves.

The joys of grandparenting

For instance, Alison Lim, chairperson of the Grander Together taskforce, is a grandmother of two girls aged two and four and a half years. She also has a third grandchild on the way.

Recounting her excitement of being a grandparent, Alison shared: “People say, ‘Oh when you talk about grandparenting, your eyes light up.'” 

Three generations in one picture: Alison (centre) with her husband, daughter and granddaughter. Source: Grander Together’s Facebook page

In a launch video released last week, other grandparents also shared from their own journeys.

“A grandchild is a symbol of unity. It really helps my whole family to be closer,” said Abdul Hamid bin Abdullah, co-vice-chairman of the taskforce and grandfather to a one-year-old boy.

Echoing this sentiment, Peter Heng, co-vice-chairman of the taskforce, said this has also been true in his experience as a grandfather to a two-and-a-half-year-old girl.

Pointing out that grandparents also play an important role in the transmission of values across generations, he emphasised: “This ability to influence your grandchildren is something that is uniquely yours.

“When you hear your grandchild sing, you hear your grandchild read, I think it puts everything into perspective. It’s worth it.”

How Grander Together was born

“In Cultivate’s conversations about family, the intergenerational matters were seldom brought up, as much of the discussion centred around the nuclear family (parents and children),” Alison told Living Room by Salt&Light.

“It became clear that there was a need for greater focus on intergenerational relationships.”

These concerns were also reinforced by findings from recent surveys conducted by Cultivate.

Its latest survey on Marriage, Family & Social Discourse found that the majority of respondents (80%) agree that grandparents bring important contributions to caregiving for their grandchildren.

However, only 64% felt that grandparents should be involved in their grandchild’s upbringing.

The logo of Grander Together, which brings to mind the coming together of generations. Source: Grander Together’s Facebook page

In an earlier Parenthood and Work survey, data also suggests that grandparents are currently not the preferred caregivers for children.

Respondents indicated grandparents as the third most common main caregivers during working hours on weekdays (15%), behind mothers (44%) and institutionalised childcare (21%).

It is unclear whether the reasons driving these responses are because of the later retirement age of grandparents, a lack of Government benefits to encourage grandparenting, fears over a clash in parenting styles, or even the personal aspirations of grandparents.

Nevertheless, Grander Together is on a mission to promote the benefits of grandparenting and strengthen intergenerational bonds.

Cultivating intergenerational families

Speaking about the plans that are in the pipeline to encourage and equip grandparents, Alison said that the taskforce intends to publish more stories and personal experiences.

A website for Grander Together is also in the works.

More research to explore various aspects of intergenerational relationships and grandparenting will be done as well.

“We will eventually launch talks and workshops, either on our own or in partnership with other organisations,” she added.

When asked how other relevant organisations can support the movement, Alison said: “We believe that everyone in the community can and should engage with the topic of intergenerational relationships and grandparenting, including religious groups such as churches and mosques.”

One of the practical things they can already start doing is integrating more intergenerational elements into regular activities, she proposed.

“For example, churches can consider including grandparents and other extended family members in family life talks, workshops and events,” suggested Alison.

“While it is common to organise people by age, such as separate youth and adult services, there could be dedicated events designed to bring different age groups together to cultivate mutual appreciation.”

Interested to learn more about grandparenting and how to build stronger intergenerational relationships? Do follow Grander Together’s Facebook page to receive updates. 

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