Family

When God plays matchmaker … through a trishaw

by Geraldine Tan // September 28, 2018, 4:26 pm

When_God_plays_matchmaker_wedding

Shua and Enoch on their wedding day in 2007 at Trishaw Park. "We wanted a really simple wedding, just sign the paper and go, but the whole thing became so big that people thought we were making a movie," chuckles Enoch. All photos courtesy of Shua Cho and Enoch Quek.

He was the young trishaw rider trying to earn an extra buck on the weekends. She was the Korean tourist visiting Singapore for the very first time.

They did not imagine, when they met that sunny day in 2000, that God had just set in motion their love story – one that would span 4,500km, 18 years, and counting.

“Think carefully then say ah!” Shua Cho warns her husband, Enoch Quek, as he recalls that fateful day.

“I … I need to survive, I need to live!” stammers Enoch, 39, feigning fear before they both collapse into laughter.

“It was not really love at first sight,” he admits, a sentiment shared by Shua, 37.

“He looked like a little boy. He was so skinny, so dark, full of pimples and he was botak (bald)!” 

Almost two decades on, this chemistry remains palpable between the owners of Koinonia hairdressing salon, located in the quaint Tiong Bahru neighbourhood.

“Your phone ring”

Shua, who was on holiday in Singapore with her mother and aunt, remembers Enoch as “not very friendly”.

But she was forced to speak to him with her limited English as he was unaware that his phone was ringing, right next to her ear, during the trishaw ride.

Enoch and Shua when they first met in 2000. Shua recalls with exasperation, "I don't know how to speak English then and he kept asking whether I really remember his contact details in English!" Enoch chuckled at the memory.

Enoch and Shua when they first met in 2000. Shua recalls with exasperation: “I don’t know how to speak English then and he kept asking whether I remember his contact details in English!”

Your phone ring” were her exact words to Enoch. Words that sparked a conversation and saw them exchanging emails and phone numbers by the end of the ride.

The language and cultural barriers between them only taught them to be more patient with each other.

Though they only met briefly in Singapore and continued to keep in touch via email after, he helped her to find suitable language schools when she visited Singapore again.

His helpful and gentle demeanour struck her.

In the autumn of 2001, Enoch visited her in Seoul. This time, sparks flew.

The language and cultural barriers between them only taught them to be more patient with each other.

“I think the chemistry and the communication were better when I don’t know how to speak English,” joked Shua. Turning serious, she says that it is easier to meet someone who is good looking than it is to meet someone with a heart like Enoch’s.

Meeting God

Not long after they got together, Shua moved to Japan to further her training as a hairstylist. It was a challenging period for her as she juggled school and work.

Her comfort, besides spending time with God, were the phone calls from Enoch.

“He called me every day and consoled me. I really felt his love,” reveals Shua. “The phone bill, I think, can buy house already!”

Shua took the chance to bring Enoch to church when she was in Singapore for a mission trip.

Shua took the opportunity to take Enoch to church when she was in Singapore for a mission trip.

After 18 months, she returned to Korea. But she soon joined a short-term mission trip to Singapore. She took the opportunity to take Enoch, who was a pre-believer then, to church in 2003.

“The first time I stepped into a church, I didn’t know what to expect and was quite sceptical about the message,” he says. Before she returned to Seoul, she urged him to keep going.

And he did, but for the wrong reason – to keep her happy. Over time, that changed.

“Eventually I went because I enjoyed talking to God and praising Him, not to gain her approval.”

But it was also during this time that Shua became increasingly concerned that she may love him more than God. She also knew God’s call on her life: To be a hairstylist. Unsure how IT-trained Enoch would fit into her destiny, she decided to call it off after six years.

Love language

Determined to do things right this time, she prayed fervently for her life partner.

She listed down what she wanted, including these non-negotiables: A born-again Christian, who’s filled with the Holy Spirit and born into a Christian family.

Close to a year after they broke up, Shua was introduced to someone who checked everything on her list. But, strangely, she was not happy, and committed the matter to God.

God reminded her that they had the most important thing: Love.

A week after that encounter, Enoch unexpectedly called and told her that he intended to visit her in Seoul.

“I told him, ‘Are you crazy? Do you know what’s going on? I might marry somebody, you know?’ He said, ‘Doesn’t matter. God asked me to just go and see you.’”

On the way to the airport to pick him up, she realised that she still loved him. When it came time for Enoch to return to Singapore, she asked him to pray together for a month to discern if this was really God’s will. He agreed.

During that month, Shua received multiple confirmations from God’s Word. On the final day, she was led to read 1 Corinthians 13 – the famed passage on love.

But what struck her were verses 1-3 – the importance of having love.

Trishaw wedding

God asked her to look at Enoch: Though he only matched one item on her list, it was the most important criterion. God reminded her that they had the most important thing: Love.

Her Heavenly Father assured her that if they followed closely after Him in marriage, He would bring the rest of the conditions to pass.

With that, they decided to get married.

Shua and Enoch on their wedding day in 2007. Theirs is a love story that spanned 4,500km, 18 years and counting. All photos courtesy of Shua Cho and Enoch Quek.

Shua and Enoch on their wedding day in 2007. Theirs is a love story that spans 4,500km, 18 years, and counting.

They tied the knot in 2007 in Trishaw Park, where they first met. Enoch and Shua wanted to keep things simple but Enoch’s friends at the Trishaw Park decided to cater food and decorate, not only the trishaw, but the park’s surrounds too. The commotion drew hordes of onlookers, who thought they were filming a movie.

“We felt quite pai seh (embarrassed). I had told the Justice of Peace that it would just be the three of us; just sign and go. Even Shua got a shock. That was quite memorable,” says Enoch, the memory bringing a smile to his face.

Three strands 

Shua sees their marriage in the light of Ecclesiastes 4:12: “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

“Marriage won’t be all smooth sailing but, with God in the centre, He will help us to pull through difficult times.”

“We believe marriage is a bond put together by God. It won’t be all smooth sailing but with God in the centre – the third strand – He will help us to pull through difficult times,” agrees Enoch.

Marriage also taught them the meaning of sacrificial love.

Five years into their marriage, God spoke to Shua about opening her own hair salon. By this time, Enoch had switched from IT to knowledge management and business processes – a providential act of God that prepared them to run a business.

Lowering her voice, Shua says: “I am very thankful for my husband because he sacrificed his career for my dream.” She had never imagined that she would one day start a salon with Enoch – fulfilling yet another of God’s promises to her.

Yet, that is not what she is most thankful for.

Never give up

“With him, I was able to start a Christian family, which is my very best dream,” Shua says.

“We can give up everything but we don’t give up on each other.”

Before they started Koinonia Salon in 2013, they promised each other that no matter what happens, they would not divorce.

From the Old Testament to the New Testament, the Bible repeatedly shows that families are the most important building block to human society, and as such, should be nurtured and protected. (See Genesis 2:24, Genesis 6:18, Matthew 19)

Establishing a strong family unit is one of the basic things in our lives but as time passes and culture changes, our priorities have been misplaced, she notes.

Enoch and Shua together with their 7-year-old daughter, Noelle. Despite being business owners, they are mindful to put family needs before the salon's.

Enoch and Shua together with their daughter, Noelle. Despite being business owners, they are mindful to put family needs before the salon’s.

As business owners and parents of seven-year-old Noelle, they contemplated various means to increase revenue, including extending their opening hours. But at the end of the day, “you have to think whether it will affect your family. If they agree, great. If they don’t, then you shouldn’t do it,” say Shua and Enoch. The desire to do great exploits for God at the expense of family is never worth it.

“We can give up everything,” they say, “but we don’t give up on each other.” 

About the author

Geraldine Tan

Geraldine is a former news journalist, public relations practitioner and research editor with a penchant for puns, punctuation and a positive attitude. She is always up for the next new adventure and is on a quest to bake the perfect chocolate chip cookie. Geraldine is now Assistant Editor at Salt&Light.

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