“Go!”

Sitting in his wheelchair, an elderly man throws a battered tennis ball as far as he can across the hall.

Miso, a three-year-old Lagotto Romagnolo (an Italian water dog), bolts toward the ball and catches it in her mouth, before running back to the man and dropping it at his feet.

“Good girl,” he says, chuckling as he pats Miso with a wrinkled hand.

Miso with her owner, volunteer Doreen Ong (right), sitting with a nursing home resident at a Pawfriends session. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

In another corner of the hall, a mild-tempered brown Pomeranian named Macaroni rests in the lap of another elderly man, who quietly strokes her head.

While some dogs are energetic, other dogs like Macaroni exude a calm aura suitable for quieter residents. Photo by Gracia Lee.

He looks on at some five dogs in the centre of the room as they perform tricks like spinning in circles, jumping over horizontal poles and ringing a bell in exchange for treats, eliciting smiles and laughter from all those present.

Elsewhere in the room, Uncle Lim clutches a pink hair brush and spends time combing the fur of two whippets, Rosie and Gus, and later a pair of corgis named Socks and Boots. He only takes a break from brushing to hold out small hoops for two Pomeranians, Joey and Taro, to leap through.

Smiling from ear to ear, Aunty Nellie, 88, tells Salt&Light that she is a dog lover and wishes she could own one herself. But playing with these dogs once a week is good enough for her.

Dog-lover Aunty Nellie has a moment with golden retriever Manny. Photo by Gracia Lee.

“Cute! Very cute,” she says with a laugh, listing the different tricks she has seen them perform. “I’m so happy to see them … Also can joke, can talk with the volunteers.”

Loneliness in the winter years

These elderly persons were among eight residents at St John’s–St Margaret’s (SJSM) Nursing Home who were spending their afternoon in the company of 10 dogs and a handful of volunteers – a break from their usual daily routine.

Named Pawfriends, the hour-long volunteer-led animal interaction activity is held twice a week and is often the highlight of the week for the 30 residents it serves across these two sessions.

During each Pawfriends session, residents can choose to interact with the dogs or simply watch them perform tricks. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

“The majority of the residents at the nursing home do not have family or friends visiting them regularly. Some do not have visitors at all,” said Alvina Tan, the volunteer who started Pawfriends in 2022.

Uncle Wong*, a 91-year-old resident realised during a Pawfriends session that one of the volunteers was the son of his old church friend who had passed on.

When the volunteer heard this, he promised to bring his mother, also Uncle Wong’s old friend, to visit him at the next session.

Uncle Lim is Pawfriends’ “resident groomer” as he enjoys brushing the dogs. Photo by Gracia Lee.

On the morning of the visit, Uncle Wong insisted on skipping his usual morning tea so that he could use the time to shave himself. In his excitement, he also soiled himself and had to have his clothes changed.

“While he was being changed, tears flowed down his cheeks as he could not contain his excitement at the thought of meeting his old friend again,” said Alvina, 55.

Hearing about this incident moved her heart: “In your winter years, loneliness must be so real. It must be such a struggle.”

Touched by God’s compassion

In Singapore, there are approximately 16,000 elderly who live in 77 nursing homes, and this number is set to rise as the nation’s population ages. By 2030, one in four Singaporeans is expected to be 65 years old and older.

“I realised that apart from physical care, nursing homes in general are not resourced to meet the social and emotional needs of their residents,” said Alvina.

“Without our volunteer activities, many residents would have hardly anything to look forward to for the rest of their lives. Can you imagine spending all your waking hours with only the television as your companion for the rest of your life?”

Simple activities like throwing balls, holding out hoops and brushing help the elderly residents exercise their upper body, as well as improve their dexterity and mobility, said Alvina. Photo by Gracia Lee.

This is why Alvina and what she calls her “Pawfriends tribe” are committed to do their part by coming down to SJSM nursing home twice a week with their dogs – and a listening ear.

“I used to have trouble relating to the elderly. I felt that we had little in common and I did not know how to comfort them when they spoke about their problems. So, as far as possible, I would minimise my interactions with them,” Alvina shared.

“However, God has since opened my eyes to the needs of this group of people and touched my heart with His compassion for them.”

Restoring the light in their eyes

Sharing about how Pawfriends started, Alvina confessed that she initially decided to do it for “selfish” reasons as she wanted to find a meaningful activity to do with her family’s new dog, a white Pomeranian named Joey.

“Joey brought us so much joy that I felt a need to steward this special gift of God well,” said Alvina, whose family has two other dogs.

While Alvina (centre) previously had difficulties relating to the elderly, conducting Pawfriends for close to two years now has helped her to gain more compassion for them. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

Joey’s arrival to their family in 2021 coincided with the completion of Project Spring-Winter, an initiative by SJSM Church, which Alvina attends, to redevelop its premise into an inter-generational campus comprising a nursing home, senior care centre, preschool and church.

So when the 266-bed nursing home opened, she mooted the idea of Pawfriends, a volunteer-run activity for the elderly residents.

During the first Pawfriends pilot run in September 2022, Alvina was shocked to see all six of the participating residents arrive expressionless.

“No smile, no frown, no light in their eyes. When we greeted them, four of them simply stared at us blankly,” she recalled.

A resident with Joey, the Pomeranian who helped Alvina kick-start Pawfriends in 2022. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

However, when the four dogs arrived on the scene, everything changed. From looking listless and uninterested, the residents began to relax and agreed to hold and pet the dogs at the encouragement of the volunteers.

“Soon after, everyone was smiling. We could see the light in their eyes. Some residents even got so carried away that it took a bit of coaxing to get them to let us take the dogs back from them!” said Alvina.

“By the end of the session, all of them were saying ‘See you next week!’ as they were wheeled back to their ward.”

After that pilot run, Alvina knew there was much more that Pawfriends could do.

A special human touch

In these past two years, the dogs at Pawfriends have not only been playmates for the elderly nursing home residents, but also acted as bridges between them and the volunteers.

Uncle Tham, 73, told Salt&Light that he enjoys the company of the volunteers the most.

“It’s the human touch. We talk about anything under the sun. They try to test me whether I’m up to date by talking about politics and things like that. They ask me about the American elections. I’m following it.”

The thing Uncle Tham (right) enjoys the most about Pawfriends is the opportunity to chat with the volunteers, he said. Photo by Gracia Lee.

When some volunteers heard that Uncle Tham, who has had Parkinson’s for 24 years, wanted to attend church, they brought him to SJSM Church, which is conveniently located in the same compound as the nursing home.

While Uncle Tham is a Christian, he had not attended church since being admitted into the home.

That week, the sermon on the parable of the Good Samaritan spoke to him. “I asked God what am I doing here? Then I saw that these (his fellow residents) are all my neighbours,” said Uncle Tham, who was inspired to be a Good Samaritan to them.

He got his wife to bring a mahjong set and some Rummikub sets to the nursing home, and started regular games sessions with the residents and nurses in his ward, in hopes of injecting some fun into their daily lives.

However, the games have been rather challenging, he shared good-naturedly.

“You know mahjong right? You’ve got to build a wall of cards, and these people have got mobility issues. They build them and then they (accidentally) destroy it again. The walls will fall down, and they knock each other’s cards down and they start arguing about it.

“Then you need to count the cards again, and they are very slow in counting or miscount, and you have to start all over again. So it takes a lot of patience. Some of them have dementia, they can’t remember the card they just threw.

“It’s an experience. It takes a lot of effort,” he said, as the volunteers laughed.

“You are my friend”

Uncle Lim told Alvina during one Pawfriends session that he would like to attend a service at SJSM Church at least once before he dies, as he hopes to have a Christian funeral.

So one week, she took him to church. Right after the service, he asked to attend again the following week. A few weeks later, Uncle Lim became a Christian.

“Right after saying the Sinner’s Prayer, he told me, ‘They say ‘My cup runneth over’ – this is how I am feeling right now!'” Alvina recalled.

Pawfriends offers residents not just a fun time, but an opportunity for volunteers to connect with them. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

Later, he said to her: “When I first came here, I was lost and my life was a blank. But now I am happy. I have friends. You are my friend.”

Since his first visit, Uncle Lim has never missed a single church service. He has even successfully encouraged some nurses in his ward to attend church too, said Alvina.

Adding life to days

It is not just the residents who have found joy in these newfound friendships, but the volunteers too.

Whenever they hear that certain residents who had participated in Pawfriends have passed on, their hearts ache.

Knowing that time is short, and eager to spend more time with their elderly friends, these volunteers now want to go beyond the Pawfriends sessions and organise dinners for more residents.

Aunty Nellie would love to own a dog, but interacting with her Pawfriends every week is enough to put a smile on her face. Photo courtesy of Alvina Tan.

They also have started a Pawfriends (Cats) programme once every two weeks for residents who prefer interacting with cats.

Alvina said: “Isn’t this what God’s economy is about? He fills us with so much joy as we see the impact of our giving, and expands our hearts to give even more.

“My hope is that every Pawfriends volunteer will experience this multiplication of capacity to love, and seize the small window of opportunity that we have to enrich what is left of the residents’ lives.”

*Name has been changed.

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