Sarina Siregar, 50, still remembers the day her son was given provisional approval to enrol at a church kindergarten. 

Her son Tamimi Pohan suffers from brittle bone disease, osteogenesis imperfecta, an incurable disease which means that his bones break easily. Now 15 years old, he has had more than 70 fractures from his spine to his limbs.

Tamimi, then age 6, had been rejected by more than seven schools.

But in Bethesda (Depot Walk) Kindergarten, Tamimi was given a space to grow and be himself.

Sowing seeds

Mrs Amy Lee, then-principal of the kindergarten, recounted the phone call she received from Mrs Siregar. As she listened, Mrs Lee was struck by her predicament.

Even a school for those with special needs had turned them down.

Pre-school education is not compulsory in Singapore. About 1% of each new Primary 1 cohort miss out on pre-school education. But the effects on them are severe. Students who miss preschool suffer a major disadvantage; few are able to catch up on basic literacy and numeracy skills taught at that level.

Since early 2000, community groups have worked with the government to identify such children pre-emptively and provide early intervention.

“I’m a teacher at heart,” explained Mrs Lee, adding that she had a tender spot for students with special needs and behavioural challenges. Over the years, she has accepted many such children because she believes what they need most is an environment of love and compassion.

Bethesda (Depot Walk) Kindergarten recently ran a fundraiser to help Tamimi raise funds for his transport costs after his dad lost his job during COVID-19. From left: Mrs Chan Lai Youk (its current principal), Mrs Tay Lai To (Tamimi’s kindergarten teacher), Dwi Lestari (Tamimi’s helper), Sarina Serigar and her husband Muliadi Pohan. Photo courtesy of Bethesda (Depot Walk) Kindergarten.

It was the very reason for the kindergarten’s existence, she said of the school set up by Bethesda Hall Depot Walk in Bukit Merah. “When I joined the school, I prayed with the map of the area in front of me. We are here to sow seeds of the Gospel and make sure that our good works point to Jesus.”

Mrs Lee, now 55, has since retired, but is still actively involved in the kindergarten, often returning to conduct lessons with other church volunteers.

Opening the door

Mrs Lee called Mrs Siregar and Tamimi down for a personal assessment before offering him a space. “I cannot promise you until I see Tamimi,” Mrs Lee recalled telling Mrs Siregar.

“We knew our limitations,” said Mrs Lee. Even though the school’s infrastructure was well-suited to wheelchairs which Tamimi depended on. Her teachers, whom she had personally interviewed, were receptive and compassionate towards children with disability. Parents of students were also clear about Mrs Lee’s stance towards enrolling children with disabilities and special needs.

Organisational liabilities were a major concern. Tamimi’s condition made him so susceptible to broken bones that even a “wrong” touch could cause a fracture, let alone rough play with other rambunctious pre-schoolers.

Mrs Siregar would need to sign an indemnity form and Tamimi’s helper would need to attend school with him.

Eventually, Mrs Lee’s provisional approval was confirmed by the church board which oversaw the school. Tamimi was enrolled into the kindergarten at K1.

“I cannot forget them,” Mrs Siregar said, her gratitude apparent even after so many years. “They are the first one who opened the door for my son to study.

“Even if it is a church, it’s okay,” she added.

Bethesda (Depot Walk) Kindergarten is a Christian kindergarten which teaches about God and Christian values from Bible characters. “This is not Sunday school, but we do talk about God. All the parents know that,” clarified Mrs Lee.

Tamimi with Dann, his best friend in kindergarten, after a dance performance. It had been specially choreographed so that Tamimi could participate. The boys are still in touch with each other today. Photo courtesy of Amy Lee.

A blessing, not burden

Operationally, many changes were necessary. These required much thought and consideration. However, what was most important to Mrs Lee and her teachers was that such accommodations would have to be made “without making Tamimi feel like a chore” to have around.

Tamimi’s form teacher, Mrs Tay Lai To, described how almost all her class activities were modified so that Tamimi would not feel left out. Restricted mostly to his pram, his limited mobility was a far cry from active pre-schoolers who seldom sit still.

“We wanted to make him feel welcome,” said Mrs Tay, who was more concerned that the other children would unknowingly say hurtful things to him.

“We never felt like he was a burden. What I believe is what I tell the children: How God has made you is the best, you don’t need to be someone else. When God makes you as you are, make the best of it.”

Clever adjustments

Indeed, they made the best of it. Even though Tamimi was often in hospital, Mrs Lee and Mrs Tay went to great lengths to ensure that he would not miss out on the activities.

The current K2 class welcoming back Tamimi, now 15 years old, when he visited the school earlier this year. It was part of a fundraising campaign hosted by the kindergarten. Photo courtesy of Bethesda (Depot Walk) Kindergarten.

When there was a school excursion to Underwater World as part of a project on sea creatures, Tamimi had just fractured his hip and was especially fragile. Mrs Lee did not want Tamimi to miss out, so she made a separate arrangement for the entire morning session to visit a schoolmate whose parent owned a large marine aquarium. There, they had an outdoor session conducted by the parent.

One of Tamimi’s favourite memories from his days in kindergarten was the telematch organised by church volunteers, parents and teachers. Usually a high-energy activity that includes much running and shrieks, it was adapted to include a number of games where participants were seated.

At the annual school graduation play where students reenacted the Christmas story and the birth of Jesus, one role was created that would accommodate Tamimi’s pram: The donkey that travelled with Mary and Joseph. 

It was a small role, but one that brought Mrs Siregar much comfort. “As a mother, I look around me, my son is different,” she said. “But I’m very proud that my son (had) the opportunity (to perform).”

“It was such a blessing to have him in the kindergarten,” said Mrs Lee. “My teachers rose to the occasion and they shone.”

Even after Tamimi graduated in 2011, Mrs Lee and Mrs Tay stayed in touch with Mrs Siregar and Tamimi.

In 2019, the kindergarten launched a fundraiser to help Tamimi’s family who were struggling to finance his transport and medical costs.

“Your child’s education doesn’t end here. The door is always open,” surmised Mrs Lee.