For a while, we parents were like investors watching the stocks, or farmers watching the weather.

Every rise in community infections made us wonder: Will we be doing HBL (Home Based Learning) again?

Then, Singapore returned to Phase 2, and one by one, schools and then tuition centres began to see Covid-19 infections.

The wondering became rumblings among parent chatgroups.

Some wanted to ask their schools to move into HBL. After all, the June holidays are but two weeks away. Others thought there was a chance the holidays themselves would be brought forward.

Then came the announcement on the evening of May 16 and it was “here we go again”.

Schools – primary, secondary, junior college and Millennia Institute (MI) – will start HBL from May 19 to the end of the term on May 28.

One teacher friend noted quite sanguinely: “It’s not so bad this time. At least it’s just eight days.”

Sentiments amongst parents were similar – with experience comes, if not wisdom, then some measure of preparedness.

Said Bryan Tan, CEO of the Centre for Fathering: “Although I’m dismayed at the move towards WFH (Work from Home) and HBL to reduce the community spread of Covid-19, I’m grateful that our family has the capacity and resources to undertake both daunting tasks simultaneously.”

So, how are families doing HBL better this time round? Parents share tips with Salt&Light.

1. Get kids involved

During last year’s Circuit Breaker, Christabel Tan found herself working triple time.

As a secondary school teacher, she not only had to work from home but also navigate the uncharted territory of conducting HBL for her students. As mother to two primary school students, she had to help oversee her children’s HBL experience.

As the wife of an essential worker who had to work outside the home, she was left to do it all alone.

Powering through those many weeks when she was teacher, tutor and mum all rolled into one has helped Christabel plan for this round of HBL.

“During last year’s HBL, I prepared each child’s timetable for the day. Based on what the teachers had scheduled for the students, I drafted the timetable for each child.

“This year, I’m going to encourage my boys to take ownership and draft their own timetable so they will learn to be more independent and not rely too much on me.”

2. Set ground rules

From the last round, Christabel also found that she was often interrupted by her children during their HBL while she was conducting her own lessons online. This time, she is prepared.

Said Christabel: “I am going to set up some ground rules such as: When mummy is conducting a lesson online, please do not disturb and try to solve your issues yourself.”

Now that her children are a year older and are more seasoned home-based learners, she reckons it will work out.

The Foongs who run The Treasure Box SG (TTB), a Christian resource and services company for teaching children, are prepared for other things that come with HBL and WFH.

“Like it or not, closer proximity will surely bring about some friction. I don’t think we can fully avoid having differences or some level of frustration towards each other.

“But we can lay out and communicate some coping strategies with each other,” said Esther Foong.

She and her husband, Elvin, have worked out different ways of managing their two children aged eight and 10 when the HBL quarrels erupt.

“Our son Nathan prefers to be left alone when emotions are welling up or when something bad happens, like when a quarrel breaks out.

“As for Phoebe, it is totally different. She says all she needs is a hug and a long cuddle,” said Esther.

So, even though parenting instincts demand that they “probe, investigate, make right or even discipline”, the Foongs are learning to let their son walk away to collect himself before settling the matter.

As a visual learner, their son also responds better to pictures than words. He has asked that they draw out a mind map or flowchart when explaining things to him.

3. Make schedules

From the last round of HBL, home tutor Rebecca Seow found that juggling her job and managing her two sons’ HBL left her feeling overwhelmed.

This year, instead of multi-tasking, she will be scheduling.

“One improvement I will make for this HBL is to provide more of my presence to my children during their hours of HBL.

“I aim to schedule all offline work to be done when my children are awake, while leaving online work to be done after they have slept.

“This would free up more time to address their concerns without having to worry about work online, which is more tedious and requires constant undivided attention.”

The Lims, Dickson and Allison, are also counting on re-working their schedules to accommodate HBL.

Said Dickson: “The last HBL caught us scrambling to arrange time to coach or supervise the kids’ online work while trying to settle work arrangements.

“This time we are much better prepared and also better coordinated in work schedules.”  

Allison, who is a school principal, has asked for flexibility to leave work earlier to work from home so she can supervise their four children.

When Allison is in school, Dickson, who works in an investment bank, will ensure he does not take any calls so that he can be available to the children.

4. Work with the school

“Don’t be afraid to ask the teachers for extra time or flexible deadlines for the kids.

“Most teachers want to help and don’t want the kids to be stressed by their parents’ specific availability,” said Dickson.

5. Embrace the opportunity

HBL and WFH are not what we are used to. They are, for the most part, not how we want to function either. But they have also presented us with opportunities we have never had before.

During the Circuit Breaker last year, families found they had more time together. Dickson plans to use this time well.

“We are praying that discipleship is strengthened through modelling, with the closer family time spent working together at home.

“They rarely get to watch us at work. This is our chance to train up a child in the way he should go, so that even when he is old, he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).”

Agreed Wendy Leow who has a daughter in primary school and another in secondary school: “I’m going to chill because they watch how we react.

“This time round, I’m better prepared and can manage the expectations better. I’m going to give them space and not nag. I’ll just be available when they need help.”

Covid-19 has also revealed the needs of many people, giving families plenty of chances to lend a helping hand.

Said Bryan who runs Centre for Fathering, which oversees DADs for Life (DFL) and MUMs for Life (MFL): “Professionally, DFL and MFL provide resources and programmes to help parents understand and communicate the pandemic to children, and strengthen relationships and communication at home.

“Personally, I’m willing to help friends tide through financially, and support with childcare or a listening ear.

“There’s no good way to manage HBL and WFH. So, what we can do is embrace the difficult situation and manage our own expectations of WFH, and how much we can support our children with their HBL.”

6. Let faith arise

Even as this round of infections seem to target the young, parents are choosing to fight the fear with faith.

Said Esther: “A song that our family has been singing since the announcement of the stricter measures is Jesus, Strong and Kind by CityAlight. It is a song of hope and assurance and directs our attention back to our good and faithful God.

“For the Lord is good and faithful
He will keep us day and night
We can always run to Jesus
Jesus, strong and kind.”

“We are reminded of John 6:37. Jesus will not turn us away. We can run to Him for refuge and relief when we are in need, when we are weak, when we are fearful or when we are feeling lost.”

Christabel is praying for peace over her household – “so the parents won’t go mad” – and “claiming Isaiah 41:10”.

Added Rebecca: “We are holding on to 2 Corinthians 12:9 because I know that I cannot do it all alone.

“Having to manage more than I can humanly bear, I need to place more dependence on God so that when God chooses to bless me through this situation, I can give Him all glory.”

Wendy is counting on the steadfastness of God.

“I am remembering Hosea 6:3. The sun rises every morning come rain or shine, without fail. So, our Lord will be with us without fail too.”